Left: transgender activist, model, and vlogger Aydian Dowling; right: musician and entertainer, Adam Levine
What’s going on with gender these days? A recent study documented that half of all Millennials believe that gender exists on a spectrum and shouldn’t be limited to the categories of male and female. These findings were reported in Fusion’s Massive Millennial Poll, which surveyed 1,000 people aged 18-34 about everything from politics to dating to race issues. Poll results also suggest young people are moving away from a binary conception of gender, a major shift from previous generations.
According to the study, 57 percent of female Millennials believe that gender falls on a spectrum, compared with 44 percent of men. And Millennials in the Northeast were even more likely to say so – up to 58 percent! (In the South, that number fell to 42 percent.)
The poll also found a respondent’s race identification was associated with substantial differences with regard to views of gender identity. White Millennials were the most likely to support the concept of a non-binary gender system: 55 percent of whites said gender is on a spectrum, compared to 47 percent of Latinos and 32 percent of African Americans.
Transgender and Non-Binary IDs
Non-binary people are people who don’t feel male or female. They may feel like both or something in between. Likewise, they might think of their gender as changing over time or they may not relate to gender at all.
Countries like India recognize a third gender, but in the U.S. there is no such federal recognition or policy that recognizes non-binary gender identification. Increasingly, some cities are creating ID cards for municipal services that do not include gender. San Francisco and Oakland CA, for example, both have municipal ID cards that don’t specify gender at all.
Young people entering universities today are also more likely to see gender-neutral restrooms, ID cards, and on-campus housing options. In recognition of this trend, students at San Francisco State University have housing options that include “other gender-identity roommate pairings, regardless of biological sex.” Recently (2013), Colorado College made national headlines when a job seeker complained the job application asked applicants to check one of five genders: “not disclosed,” “male,” “female,” “transgender,” or “queer.”
A recent BBC News program discussed the story of Leo. At the time of the program, Leo was 10 years old. For most of his life he lived as a girl, but at one point he began to speak openly about having a sense that this didn’t feel quite right. With research help from his parents, he’s decided he is non-binary, even though dresses as a boy and has adopted a male name. Leo explains:
I’m not a boy.
I thought I was a boy because I’m not entirely a girl. We tried that for a bit, and I thought: “No, this is not right.”
Then we did some research and we found the word is gender non-binary… and it really works; it’s just me.
I don’t know what age I was when I identified that I wasn’t feeling right.
Actually, I told my teacher first. I got really frustrated because I asked why none of the girls got boys’ parts in a play that we were doing. It wasn’t right.
I pulled her over and said: “I’m not a girl.”
For more on Leo’s story, refer to the program link.
Gender as a Spectrum
Gender is Socially Constructed
Historically, many feminists and sociologists have understood sex, gender, and even terms like ‘woman’ as gender terms that depend on social and cultural factors. They distinguished sex (being a female or male bodied person) from gender (being/presenting as a woman or a man), although most language users treat the terms sex and gender interchangeably. Recently, efforts to make a distinction between the two have come under attack, as many people find the idea that something that appears so fundamentally grounded, like sex and gender, may, in fact, not be at all stable.
The existentialist philosopher and feminist Simone de Beauvoir famously claimed that “one is not born, but becomes a woman.” In her work “The Second Sex,” she discusses how the traditional ways that we have tended to think about sex and gender are not “natural” but are rather a product of socialization. In other words, females (sex) become women (gender) through a social process, where they learn to acquire feminine traits and perform what is recognized as natural feminine behavior. Masculinity and femininity are, in this respect, understood to be the products of nurture and how individuals are brought up.
Both femininity and masculinity are in this sense products of a nurturing/social learning process. They are causally constructed. In other words, we understand social forces have a causal role in bringing gendered individuals into existence or that they shape the way we are qua women and men. And the mechanism of construction is social learning (Haslanger 1995, 98) [For more on this, see social learning theory. Social learning theory combines cognitive learning theory (which posits that learning is influenced by psychological factors) and behavioral learning theory (which assumes that learning is based on responses to environmental stimuli). Psychologist Albert Bandura integrated these two theories and came up with four requirements for learning: observation (environmental), retention (cognitive), reproduction (cognitive), and motivation(both). This integrative approach to learning was called social learning theory (Psychology Today)].
Feminist theorist Kate Millett argues further that gender differences have “essentially cultural, rather than biological bases” that result from differential treatment (1971, 28–9). For her, gender is “the sum total of the parents’, the peers’, and the culture’s notions of what is appropriate to each gender by way of temperament, character, interests, status, worth, gesture, and expression” (Millett 1971, 31). Feminine and masculine gender-norms, however, are problematic in that gendered behavior conveniently fits with and reinforces women’s subordination so that women are socialized into subordinate social roles: they learn to be passive, ignorant, docile, emotional helpmeets for men (Millett 1971, 26). The idea here is that since these roles are merely learned, we can create more equal societies by ‘unlearning’ social roles. Feminists, she says, should aim to diminish the influence of socialization.
Gender is Performative
One of the central concepts of gender theory is the idea that gender is “constructed.” Theorists like Judith Butler take that one step further to argue that your gender is constructed as a direct result of your repetitive perfomances of gender – things you do and discourses you engage in which have the effect of creating a “subject” position for you.
Butler is thus questioning the belief that certain gendered behaviors are natural, as she illustrates how one’s learned performance of gendered behavior (what we commonly associate with femininity and masculinity) is an act of sorts; it’s a performance imposed upon us by the norms bound up in heterosexuality. Her theory does not accept gender identity as being stable and/or coherent. Rather, she understands gender is “a stylized repetition of acts . . . which are internally discontinuous . . .[so that] the appearance of substance is precisely that, a constructed identity, a performative accomplishment which the mundane social audience, including the actors themselves, come to believe and to perform in the mode of belief” (Gender Trouble). To say that gender is performative is to argue that gender is “real only to the extent that it is performed” (Gender Trouble).
What is at stake here, of course, is the ideology of hegemonic heterosexuality. And this is precisely what makes many people so uncomfortable. Because it means they can’t take for granted things like their gender that they have always accepted as natural and normal.
For to claim that “all gender is like drag, or is drag, is to suggest that ‘imitation’ is at the heart of the heterosexual project and its gender binarism, that drag is not a secondary imitation that presupposes a prior and original gender, but that hegemonic heterosexuality is itself a constant and repeated effort to imitate its own idealizations. That it must repeat this imitation, that it sets up pathologizing practices and normalizing sciences in order to produce and consecrate its own claim on originality and propriety, suggests that heterosexual performativity is beset by an anxiety that it can never fully overcome….that its effort to become its own idealizations can never be finally or fully achieved, and that it is constantly haunted by that domain of sexual possibility that must be excluded for heterosexualized gender to produce itself” (Judith Butler, Bodies that Matter).
Sources:
Check out R.W. Connell’s “Social Organization of Masculinity.”
Judith Butler’s “Gender Trouble” and “Bodies That Matter.”
Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy
BBC News program, “I’m a non-binary 10-year-old.”
Fusion’s Massive Millennial Poll surveyed 1,000 people between the ages of 18 to 34, with a general population sample and an overall margin of error of plus-minus 3.1 percentage points. The interviews were conducted via telephone from Jan. 6 to Jan. 11. For more information on Fusion’s research methodology and poll results, refer to their proprietary website.
Psychology Today article
Discussion Questions:
What is your gender identity?
How did you get the gender identity that you have?
What are some examples of your own gender expression?
Can you share an example of how you might “perform” your gender?
Do you understand your gender as an ongoing identity project, or is it something that you don’t particularly think about? In other words – “it is what it is.”
I identify as a cis-woman. I have just always felt secure in being female and have never questioned if I would be more comfortable as a male. I enjoying doing things that are perceived as being feminine such as doing my makeup or wearing dresses. I enjoy playing softball and watching baseball, which is not seen as being the most feminine sport but that does not affect the fact that I see myself as female. I do not know what it would feel like to not identify with the sex I was born with but I can imagine that is miserable. Societally, activities, clothing, and a variety of other things are categorized by gender. Being expected to act and feel a certain way when you do not see yourself in that way must take an enormous toll on a person. I will never truly know what not identifying with my birth sex feels like, but I respect those who do not.
I think society fails to understand that sex and gender are two different things. Sex is something that you are assigned at birth due to biological variables. Gender, on the other hand, has many other factors to consider, but we still simultaneously assign gender to correspond with sex. Why is this?!
Gender is an idea socially constructed by society. It is formed by the rules that each gender is “supposed” to abide by. It is formed as early as when a girls room has to be decorated in pink, and a boys room automatically being painted blue. It can be seen by the toys children play with; girls are given Barbie dolls and imitation cooking wear, while boys are given race cars and construction kits to play with. The whole point is that gender is given. It does not come automatically; society provides us with it. What about those who do not identify within the binary dichotomy of gender? Gender should be viewed on a spectrum, for those who do not abide by societal rules of having to fin into one category.
Growing up with two older brothers, gender roles were not prevalent to me. I was always able to play sports with them, help with yard work, and everything of this nature that accompanies being a male. Something I find very interesting is that the same does not go for men. My brothers were never encouraged to participate in “female” activities with me, such as shopping or having a spa day. Although there is nothing wrong with this, I find it interesting how society finds it more acceptable for women to do “manly” things, while at the same time men receive consequences for doing “girly” things. Is this because society favors the male gender?
I had always assumed that biological sex and gender went hand in hand. It wasn’t until one of my girlfriends became a boy. Slowly my friend began to dress in men’s clothes and started a series of testosterone injections. It was a confusing time for him because while he wanted to completely transition into a male, he struggled with identifying with either a male or female gender. During this time, I realized that so many people’s genders had been chosen for them by whoever raised them. For myself, my parents never forced me to only play with barbies or wear dresses. Luckily, my parents gave me the opportunity to be who I wanted. Unfortunately, not all parents do this. Instead, when parents have a baby girl or boy, they assume their child’s gender by dressing them or purchasing them toys according to their sex. While this isn’t necessarily a wrong thing, you’re also not giving children the ability to decide for themselves. It’s very interesting to see how society deems what is fit for males and what is fit for females. Instead of wrapping a baby up in a blue or pink blanket, according to their biological sex once they are born, why not switch it up? Who says that girls have to wear dresses and play with barbies?
I am currently taking a psychology of gender class where we constantly discuss the performance of gender. There is such a stigma in society that gender must be binary that even some transgender people feel that they must perform to one extreme or the other. For example, in class one day we watched a clip from TLC’s show Jazz. Jazz is a pre-teen transgender person. She was born as a biological male but has always known that she was a girl. Her bedroom is entirely pink and filled with stuffed animals. She loves mermaids, makeup, and playing dress up. Many young girls do not express as much femininity as Jazz. Because of society’s expectations, Jazz may feel that she must perform the role of extreme femininity to justify that she is not actually a boy. If she still possessed any masculine traits, people who oppose the reality of transgender would use those against her.
I think that people in society should be more educated about different genders. Despite what most people think, biological sex is not the only factor that determines gender. The images of the gender-bread people on this blog can be used to show people that not only are there different variables that determine gender, but there are also different variations on a spectrum of each of those variables. While society is not entirely there yet, society is moving closer. More people today believe that sex is not binary than ever before. I think that celebrities such as Caitlyn Jenner also play a huge role in promoting awareness of transgender people. As education and awareness increases around the subject, more acceptances will be created.
Gender identity is definitely becoming a more widely discussed topic and millennials are more open to the gender fluidity than the older generation is. I never really heard of non binary people. So reading about that in the article was interesting. I never realized some people feel like the don’t belong in either category that society as set for us. Just because Leo feels that way doesn’t mean he should be limited by the clothing he wears. We do not have to follow the stereotype that has become normative but one should be able to set their own path.
This article was informative and brought up points I have never thought of. Being a straight female who has never questioned her gender, I forget how complex the idea of gender is. Recently, on reality TV and on social media the construct of gender has been discussed. I think that it is important for all people to understand and recognize the differences in gender whether it effects them directly or no. For example if someone was born a male but identifies as a female, who are we to say they are incorrect. Just as someone cannot technically choose if they are homosexual or heterosexual, a person cannot choose if they feel more inclined to identify as a certain gender. If gender identity is how someone feels in their head according to the article, then it is not someone our society has the ability to pass judgement on.
I do think that society has constructed its own gender roles that people unconsciously play into. The words feminine and masculine do not necessarily have to correlate with their assumed gender
As a cis-gender woman, my gender identity never quite crossed my mind growing up. I perform my gender daily as I am interested in stereotypical feminine activities such as hair, make up, shopping, and the color pink. However, it was not until I became a gender studies minor that I began learning about gender expression as well as many of the topics and facts referenced in this module as well. Yet personally for me, the idea of gender being performative did not quite click with me until I learned about intersex individuals, which the genderbread person vaguely highlights.
Statistics show that 2%, or 140 million people in the world, are born with variations of dichotomous biological development otherwise known as intersex. In other words, that would total about 80 people on Loyola’s campus. I had known intersexuality existed but was unaware of the specificities and extent of cultural dilemmas that intersex individuals have to face. The problem is that instead of telling parents that their child has characteristics of both sexes, society and the medical world are so caught up in the dichotomy of sex and gender that they instantly consider this natural occurrence an issue that needs fast fixing. At birth, doctors are more likely to determine what they deem to be the optimal gender for the child and then state that genital reconstruction procedures will fix the deviations, thus eliminating possibility for the child to make their own choice when they grow older. A bias exists considering doctors often prioritize sexual function for boys and sexual reproduction for girls, which proves that the child’s best interest is not always at hand. Sadly, the genital reconstruction surgery can actually traumatize children more than benefit them. It may cause psychological damage in the future if their personal gender identity does not line up with the gender that was chosen for them–sound familiar?
The issue does not stop there. Even if parents allow their child to grow up intersex and opt out of the surgery, they may still encounter issues in the future. Often times intersex individuals get insurance claims refused because their gender didn’t “match” the procedures they requested. For example, a woman with androgen insensitivity syndrome (AIS) may require screenings for testicular cancer. This creates what is called a “gender-procedure conflict” because insurance companies are less likely to make the connection, given the standard dichotomous model for sex and gender.
The dilemmas facing the lack of understanding between the medical field and the intersex community is a huge issue. Forcing individuals into the binary box of woman and man does not only challenge human expression, but biology as well. It is therefore important to differentiate between sex and gender. If there are not just two sexes in the world, why should there be only two genders? If a child is born intersex, do we paint their rooms pink and force them to like barbies? Or do we teach them about cars and push them to “be a man”?
The title of this article elicited so many different feelings. For one if this was 1990 an article on this topic would not be published or if it was it would not be received all too well. That leads into my next feeling which was my lack of education on this topic. I have never struggled with my gender identity nor do I know anyone that has. I have only experienced exposure to this topic indirectly and unintentionally, I don’t seek it out because it is not something that effects me. However, I like to challenge myself to learn and write about controversial topics that I don’t necessarily like voicing my opinion about.
I was astounded by the concept of non-binary people, those who don’t feel male or female or that some people think of their gender as changing over time or they may not relate to gender at all. Something that I take for granted, knowing I am a female, is something that people struggle with daily. Personally I don’t understand why this has become a choice, God made you who you are for a reason and that should be accepted. However, I also understand how that is easier said then done. Everyone goes through hard times and who am I to tell someone that their struggle isn’t valid? I believe that our role in society is not to judge others for their decisions but support them on their journey.
Gender identity has become a widely publicized problem and more people struggle with it than I could ever imagine. When I read that countries like India recognize a third gender I thought, “Good for them”. As previously stated, it is not our role to judge but support others and by recognizing a third gender India is supporting them.
San Francisco State University is supporting this group as well by making everyone feel included as they “have housing options that include other gender-identity roommate pairings, regardless of biological sex”. Everyone is trying to figure out their identity in some capacity and to support that is to be a good member of society.
I thought that this article was exceptionally explanatory for informative purposes. Identifying as a straight and white female, the issues facing the LGBTQ+ community don’t necessarily cross my radar on a daily basis. The current social movements bringing attention to these problems have the ability to positively impact those that are still unsure what LGBTQ+ individuals face on a daily basis. The ideas of gender, gender fluidity, non-binary identification and other categories did not really appear to me until high school, and I did not observe them on a regular basis until coming to Loyola. I believe the community here is really great and does a fantastic job upholding the core values of the LGBTQ+. Still, I wish I had some more information elaborating upon this topic in general for more basic informative purposes. Normally, I wouldn’t consider the idea of genders and gender identity as a “social problem” per se as what we’ve studied in class thus far, but I have a general idea of how it interplays with other aspects of our course. I am interested to learn more about this topic, and found this module to be quite helpful in building a foundation.
It amazes me everyday when I see the way that this world is changing. I love looking out and observing the reactions of those who “liked things the way they were.” Its kind of funny because as a very spiritual person, I guess I should be conforming to the thought of my peers who share the same religion… but I don’t. As a Christian, I believe that we are called to love all. This is a view that is not accepted much among my Christian peers, but one that shines very brightly in my eyes. I am not saying that I am the only Christian that thinks from this perspective, but there are not many of us that think this way. Because of this point of view that I am taking, there are many people that I cannot talk to due to how it might offend them. I never thought that people that shared the same religion as me might not accept me one day because of the people that I choose to invite into circle. Even writing this statement right now is causing me anxiety because of who might see it. But I’m more concerned about the words I am writing, and how I could be potentially offending those of the LGBTQ+ community.
One thing I have noticed while looking back on my years of education thus far is that gender was not something that was talked about until mid high school. It also wasn’t something that I thought about much because I was not going through it. It makes me very emotional when I look back on things I used to watch, and I see that the people of this wide spread community have been going through these hard times for longer that we would like to accept. As a person of color, it has been clear to me that there are many groups that are not acknowledged in our nation, but I my eyes were never opened to how many groups there were. This has only strengthened my want to fix the issues of our society, and give all of the groups a voice.
I am a firm believer that everyone in our society has the choice of who they want to be, and how they want to identify, and I know that this idea is heavily dismissed. And it’s disappointing.
When I came out to my grandma the first thing she told me was, “feelings are real, the rest is just damn plumbing,” and to this day I hold this ideal to be so true. Being a part of the LGBTQ+ I believed my outlook on gender identity was overly open minded compared to my peers, but after reading this article, I am excited to admit I was wrong. When discussing the topic in general, I have noticed an intense generational gap in opinion. As a millennial, the idea that people don’t identify as male or female isn’t completely out of the norm; I can walk down the hall and see a girl decked out in sports gear or a boy wearing hot pink nail polish and not blink an eye. However I commonly see adults struggling to accept their child’s new identity as it wasn’t normalized in their younger years. An important concept to bring up is the difference between gender and sex. Gender is how you personally identify, demonstrated by your actions, clothing and language. Sex on the other hand is the biological organs and hormones your body possesses. This differentiation is often lost in translation in my opinion and would help clear up some confusion of what gender fluidity truly is.
When I came out to my grandma the first thing she told me was, “feelings are real, the rest is just damn plumbing,” and to this day I hold this ideal to be so true. Being a part of the LGBTQ+ community I believed my outlook on gender identity was overly open minded compared to my peers, but after reading this article, I am excited to admit I was wrong. When discussing the topic in general, I have noticed an intense generational gap in opinion. As a millennial, the idea that people don’t identify as male or female isn’t completely out of the norm; I can walk down the hall and see a girl decked out in sports gear or a boy wearing hot pink nail polish and not blink an eye. However I commonly see adults struggling to accept their child’s new identity as it wasn’t normalized in their younger years. An important concept to bring up is the difference between gender and sex. Gender is how you personally identify, demonstrated by your actions, clothing and language. Sex on the other hand is the biological organs and hormones your body possesses. This differentiation is often lost in translation in my opinion and would help clear up some confusion of what gender fluidity truly is.
When asked the question “how many genders are there?,” a number of different possibilities come to mind. The easiest answer is definitely more than just two. Years have been spent trying to assign people to one of two gender categories (male or female), but this just doesn’t seem to work anymore. We live in a society where labels and categories mean much more than they should; complex ideas seem much easier when they can neatly be placed into categories. That may work for some things, but gender is definitely not one of them. “How Many Genders Are There?” discussed particular ideas that were introduced in my Sociology of Sexuality course, where we learned a lot about gender falling on a spectrum rather than into categories. I was surprised to learn that nearly half of Millennials have moved away from the binary gender system and towards the concept of non-binary gender identification. For many people, their gender matches their sex, and they have never had to question whether or not something was off. Unfortunately, there are many other people out there who have felt confused and misunderstood regarding their gender identity. I think the most important way to continue making progress with gender identity is to become educated and willing to move away from traditional beliefs and practices of gender. In this way, people may be able to understand that gender is a whole lot more than how you dress or which bathroom you use.
I absolutelty agree that gender is not limited to two categories. Yet, I was shocked to see the amount of Millennials that agreed that gender falls on a spectrum. While I do agree that gender is not limited to male and female, I feel like I am constantly surrounded by negative opinions and comments towards such people. Not even necassarily people I know well or converse with, but there seems to always be a muffled comment when for example, a transgender is confidently walking down the street.
I was born female, and still identify as a female and heterosexual, but that is just me. And yeah, at some point in your life there may be a time when you don’t understand why people find themselves to identify otherwise. But, when you have friends and loved ones who do not identify with their biological sex, or who find out that they are homosexual, I would’t imagine them to be anything other than that, its just who they are. And then it all makes sense.
Some people may not have the privilege of having people in their life who can so confidently be themselves and express themselves freely, but when you do, you only appreciate it that much more. I don’t have to deal with meeting new people, and being unsure if they will judge me for identifying as the other gender, or be afraid to hold my significant others hand in public, or being judged for being too masculine of a female, and it is so unfair to people that do. So these people are penalized just because they have the confidence to be themselves?
Therefore, the results of the poll saying that people are moving away from a binary conception of gender is a huge step in the right direction, and hopefully continues to do so.
I think it’s very interesting that Millenials are far more willing to accept the idea of non-binary genders when older generations often are far more polarized on the issue. This is something I’ve discussed with older family members, many of whom have trouble grasping the idea that gender does not always have to be male or female. Furthermore, I think there is the feeling among older members of the population that being conscious of gender issues within society really means just being politically correct in an obsessive way. I definitely do not agree with that mind set, and feel, like many people mentioned in the article, that gender does exist along a spectrum. I personally have never questioned my gender, but I can imagine that having to deal with such an identity crisis can be extremely upsetting and difficult. I know that I’ve never had to question which section of a store I shop in, or which bathroom is appropriate for me to use, but those are definitely ways that I perform my gender every day.
I was born a female, and identify as such. Growing up, I never particularly thought about my gender identity. I would say this is mostly because I don’t think my parents could even conceive the idea of being born one sex, but wanting to identify with a different gender at this time. Participating in sports, playing video games with my brothers, and even asking for the “boy toy” at McDonalds never meant I wanted to actually be a boy to them. In a way, I was very lucky to have parents who allowed me to pursue whatever my interests were, no matter which gender my interests were stereotypically for. The fact that I don’t have to think about my gender is truly a privilege that I take for granted too often.
It was only until after I came out as a lesbian to my parents that my gender started being called into question. Immediately after revealing my sexuality I was greeted with the question of, “oh do you want to be a boy now?” As I stated earlier I am very comfortable in the gender that I am in, and by my mom asking this I now feel like I have to prove my gender identity to my parents. Because of this, I definitely “perform” around my mother. I notice myself making sure I dress especially feminine at family outings, and talking much less for fear of ridicule. Often times I wonder what if I actually was transgender, how my mom would react? Why is this considered “worse” than being a queer woman in her mind? Or even in the minds of many Americans? One solution I can offer is that the fight for gay rights has been going on before the fight for gender equality. People have had more time to progress on the topic of homosexuality, therefore it is seen as “better.” It would be interesting to hear what other people have to say about this!
I am a woman and identify as a woman. I grew up in a country where male and female gender roles were very distinct and you’re either male or female and must act male or female based on your biological sex. I grew up watching my mother taking care of family business such as cooking, going to the market cleaning the house and taking care of the kids while my father worked and provide for the family. I started cooking and cleaning at the age of seven and learning other womanly things. I wasn’t allowed to wear trousers because it’s for men or raise my voice. My fiancé’s father thinks I’m not a lady because I don’t let him talk down on me and I defend myself if need be. What I’m trying to say is People should be free to identify as any gender and if it makes them happy because at the end of the day happiness is what everyone is striving for. Gender roles were created by the society. Men aren’t born playing basketball and women aren’t born cooking either. We are forced to live by those roles but there are people that will fall farther down either end of the spectrum and they too are entitled to happiness. I think everyone should identify as what they feel they are instead of being forced to be who they’re not. We’ve all got one life to live why waste it doing what a bunch of people wants you to be? I am a complete woman and I wear pants, am very opinionated and very ambitious. It’s doesn’t make me any less of a woman.
I grew up in a time when teachers in my school all wore dresses and skirts to school, they exuded their femininity. Teachers in my school would chastise girls for “acting like boys “and being rambunctious. I can recall when I was in kindergarten and a boy was teasing me so I punched him in the belly, my teacher found out and I got in trouble, and she proceeded to tell me that young girls do not behave like that and put me to the corner of the room, as punishment. I also remember in that same kindergarten class there were a couple of boys fighting on the floor and they were separated, by our teacher, and given a mild slap on the wrist. The only time where, I remember, we allowed to play around and do what the boys did, in school, was in gym class or recess (even, then, some of the girls were reminded to act like young ladies, by the lunch aides). My friends and I would meet at each other’s houses and we would play with our Barbie toys and one of the girls there wanted to play with a G.I. Joe figurine instead, the girl in our group was admonished by the mother, she said that girls play with girls’ toys and boys play with boys’ toys. Our friend’s mother took away the G.I. Joe toy and gave us her make-up kit to play with instead. All of these interactions with teachers and my friends, when I was younger, definitely shaped my gender identity. When I was younger my father wouldn’t let me pick up heavy things, perform arduous activities, in the house. My parents took me to gender specific activities, such as ballet and piano classes. I have to say, now, that I don’t behave in a traditional feminine way, however, I do feel feminine. I love to get my manicures and pedicures, go to the mall, to make-up section, and buy the pretty lipstick. Nevertheless, I don’t like to wear dresses and high heels, or conform to societies way of how females should dress. To this day, my mother always complains, why don’t you dress like a girl? If there something that is broken in my house I attempt to fix it, I get the drill, or whatever tool that is necessary, to fix a broken item in the house. There’s such an attempt, in today’s society to label everything, I believe that people should be able to identify with what they feel and not be swayed to a label or be judged.
I was born male and I identify as male. I grew up doing a lot of guy things but I genuinely liked the things that I was doing like playing sports, etc. and I think helped shaped my gender identity over time.I believe everyone should have to ability to choose what gender they decide to be. Today people have trouble deciding what gender they are and they shouldn’t be attacked or stigmatized because gender is something that is identified was we mature as a person. I see it every day that boys and girls are treated differently and have to act a certain way. And all I can say is that they should do whatever they want and should not be discouraged in anyway because of gender. A girl because she is doing something a boy should be doing shouldn’t be forced to change and vice versa. Let people do whatever they feel their gender identify should be and be open minded.
I was raised weirdly was little I played with hot rods and dinosaurs and boy toys and as I got older with a single mom I was raised to be ultra feminine. I hated the colour pink and would throw a fit of clothes weren’t comfortable. When my mother remarried when I thirteen my father taught how to use weapons and defend my self, girls at my school thought i was weird for this. They bullied me and tried hitting me until I punched them back and defended myself. Yet when I told the School I was sending myself I got in trouble and they got off scot-free. It made me mad. They started to bully my transgender friend Kat. We went to a Catholic school where even the principal was against lgbtq and those that were these things that would send me to help and it made me mad.
I’m 60 years old. I come from a line extremely capable and talented people with quite a lot of Bretz maybe not so much depth. I don’t quite understand why anybody has decided that your clothing or your activities dictate what gender you are. To me gender is biological and how you can function in a biological manner. You’re either female Or male period. Or you could be hermaphroditic. How you play with the toys God gave you is it entirely up to you. And those you play with. Society no matter which society you’re in reserves the opportunity and pleasure of judging whoever’s in it in whatever way they please. This is very fluid. Anyone who determines that their own identity is going to be stuck in whatever society decide to do this week is an idiot. For example, if I’m doing rough work I can’t wear my rings or my jewelry long sleeves or have my her flopping it’s dangerous. On the other hand if I want to put the glitter on and wear glitter in my hair on my skin and perfume myself up to bottom entirely fun. Women at this time have more choices to play than men do without scrutiny. It has not always been so. Just as we laugh at the fool so need bigger faster hotter cars. Or the idiots who are afraid because someone wrote a’s name on a sidewalk. I think we need to back away from the gender topic it is too close to the soul and to visceral. And allow people to be Who they are where they are whenever they happen to be at. And as usual they will be under the scrutiny of a wider society. And let not think that your society is only your household your community your friends your country your state your region it is also your world . That’s a lot of judgment out there. it’s coming your way learn to deal.
I’m always being told I “think like a dude, but dress like a girl.” I’m not sure how much sense that makes. It must be how I express myself. I was raised, just as I’m raising my daughter, that anyone can do or be anything. I was asked to write on this subject in the past. When it came down to it, I’m a very dominant, outgoing, outspoken person. I suppose that’s why I’m told I think like a dude. I sit down and scream at the game and drink beer with the best of them. I suppose I always wondered why other teenage girls weren’t doing that. At the same time, I’m still very much a woman. I like getting my hair and nails done. It’s difficult for me to express myself in just one way or another. Knowing that, I don’t often find myself wondering why people do the things and act the way they do. There are so many different factors to gender and therefore so many ways for people as individuals to express themselves.
I identify as female. However my sisters and I weren’t raised to be very girly. My mother banned Barbies and many princess dolls as she felt they could be damaging to our self-esteem and playing with them enforced gender roles. We were encouraged to play with all sorts of toys like blocks, minerals, dinosaurs, and plastic reptiles and bugs. The dolls we had were American Girl dolls or historical dolls that came with books because they were focused on character over image.
Even though I wasn’t raised to be a girly girl I was still raised as a girl and was encouraged to not dress or act in ways that would embarrass my mother. I was told I could do anything boys could yet, somewhat hypocritically, I would be reprimanded for not acting ladylike or polite enough. Essentially I could accomplish whatever I wanted as long as I still behaved like the other ‘good’ girls. So although I identify as female I tend to be less focused on my appearance as a representative of who I am as a person, and I still tend to like animals and rocks over fashion. I identify myself as a woman but I also feel like I can categorize myself somewhere between female and genderqueer on the spectrum.
Some examples of my gender expression are my short hair and geeky glasses. I like my haircut because it is very easy to manage and has a slightly masculine quality that I like. My glasses are also neutral looking and aren’t terribly fashionable. Another example is that I refuse to wear heels 99% of the time as I think they are pointless and uncomfortable. I like to present myself as well dressed but conservative as I just don’t like showing a lot of skin or wearing tight tops, so a lot of my wardrobe are ‘manly’ ladies sweaters and androgynous shirts.
I perform my gender when I go out and buy tons of makeup that I don’t often use. I see that my sisters have makeup and wear it every day so I set out to look pretty and do the same thing but lose interest. Then it gets thrown in the already massive pile of rarely touched powders and foundations. I have the ingrained perception that girly-er looks prettier so when I want to look professional I take way more time putting on makeup and choosing fashionable flats to wear. I still actively try to break that mentality that femininity is being the stereotyped ‘girly-girl’ and seek to enjoy being a woman without feeling the need to adhere to societies expectations for women.
I was born a female, and I identify as female. I was never the girl in class wearing a skirt and her hair in braids. I was always more of the girl wearing jeans and a t shirt. I hated the color pink, and my favorite color was blue. I never liked playing with Barbies, or playing ‘house’. I always wanted to be running around outside. I grew up on a street with several boys around my age, and very few girls my age. I was always competitive and proved I could play any sport just as good, if not better, than the boys. I remember in elementary school when my mom would get me ready for school, I always had to tell her to put my hair in a pony tail on gym days. Gym days were my favorite in school because I got to run around and show off just how good I was at all the sports. My Mom would always fight me back on it, because she wanted my hair to be down so I looked pretty, not like I was ready to run on the soccer field. My Mom always wanted me to sign up for dance classes or cheerleading. There was no way I was taking up either of those things. When I was younger, I was in karate classes, on the softball team and on the swim team, I had no interest in the “girly” activities my mother wanted to enroll me in. However my Mom always let me be myself and let me pick what activities I wanted to do. With that said, she did not always make it easy. I know that she wanted me to be the daughter she dressed in skirts, and my glittery clips in my hair but I think she accepted around middle school that there was no way that was happening.
As I’ve gotten older, I have stared to enjoy more “feminine” activities. I enjoy doing my hair and make up, on occasion I will wear dresses or skirts. But I am also very big into sports. I am a huge hockey fan and have tons of hockey apparel. Whenever I come home with a new shirt or sweatshirt, my Mom’s response will be “they didn’t have anything more girly than that?”. The apparel geared towards women at hockey games is typically pink and will have rhinestones incorporated on it somehow. I am not the type to wear pink and rhinestones, and since I’m a female I shouldn’t have to limit myself to just those clothing options. I think gender roles were always present in the sense of my appearance from an early age, but thankfully they were not forced upon me, but were still suggested.
I think that more people are becoming aware of the fact that this binary gender does not exist. However there are still plenty of people that believe there is male and female, and you must stick to your respected gender roles. I think older generations will possibly never understand that people are not limited to just female and male. Your genitalia should not determine how you identify on the inside. I think the spectrum is a great way to view gender. It may help people understand that this binary does not exist, and shows how people identify.
Like I mentioned earlier, not everyone is going to understand it and accept it. Recently my cousin in high school was telling us that there was a transgender male in her graduating class. He was born a female, but within the past year or so started transitioning from a female to a male. My aunt who is very old fashioned automatically said that it was weird and the child was looking for attention. I completely disagreed and tried to briefly explain that it was not for attention. However, there was no getting through to her and at the end of the day she believed what she wanted to believe. It’s sad that many people will not change their views on those who are transgender people. In order to prevent this stigma and show that the binary gender does not exist and show awareness of the LGBTQ community, it needs to start at a young age. I’m sure many parents would be against their children learning about transgender people at a young age because they do not agree with it, so this would be easier said than done. However allowing children to explore their gender and their identity is extremely important. We should not limit the views of children and raise them to view their gender in strictly one way.
Gender is as judith Butler explains is performative in other words, your behaviour creates your gender. The role of women and men in the society is constructed the minute they are born and based on biology- their reproductive system to be more specific- they are born with a label and a result, an specific role in the society is given to that new born. But what happens when the behavior contradicts the role constructed by the society?
To be completely honest in the society and family that I was born and rise in, that question didn’t exist. My grandfather was the head of family, he brong in the money, he was strong, everything he said was to be followed, he was full filling the dominant role that the gender he posses demanded. While my grandmother was a stay home mother, cook and clean, bare children, and please the man of the house, she too her whole life was playing the role given to her by the society. As a result to me the question of behaviorist against the role given was none existent, until I started to like the way boys dressed and dressing like them. I was punished and criticized by my grandparents ( specially my grandmother) because I wasn’t girly enough, I was dressing inappropriately for my age she always said, and always playing only with boys was not something good girls did, she said constantly. But later I realized that I was dressing and behaving inappropriately for my biological gender.I turned 18 and still was dressing like a boy, but once I decided to have a boyfriend, the way I dressed changed completely, I started to behave according to the social norm, and even though I am educated enough to know that the way I dressed and behave now is totally created by the society, I don’t fight it. Is embedded in me.
So, my question is how to we brake away from those role and labels given to us ? Who do we discontruct the gender role created by the society?
Judith Butler- gender is performative video.
http://bigthink.com/videos/your-behavior-creates-your-gender
My gender identity is female, I’ve never really thought about my gender identity until now. At home my mother is always telling me that I should do certain things just because I’m a girl and that always annoys me. I don’t really do or care for all the stereotypical “girly stuff”; I’ve always had interest in things that are supposedly just for males. Recently my mother bought camouflage pants for my brother, I saw it and wanted her to get one for me, she told me that it came from the men’s section and I told her that it didn’t matter she got really upset and said” that’s where its starts”. I think people should be able to identify and express themselves as they please.
I identify myself as a female. When I was little I was always around my male cousins. I always wanted to everything they did, play fighting, playing sports, shooting games, I was even wearing baggy clothes. My parents hated the fact I was into these activities. My mother will always say to me ” Your a girl, you need to start wearing skirts, and dresses”, ” Those are for boys, how about you play with a doll”. I always knew that my cousins had different body parts from me but I never really questioned it. As I got older it everything changed, started wearing makeup, getting my nails done, wearing heels etc. I started watching TV shows that portrays how a female should carry herself, and what she should wear.
What comes to my attention is before a baby is born, everyone wants to know its gender. ” Is it a boy or a girl?”. You are already classified before you are born. But sometimes the baby is born a boy or a girl, but as they progress in life they may not agree on the gender they are born with. That’s why I do believe that their is a third gender.
Although I identify as a male, I also believe strongly in gender being a socially constructed and fluid nature that can be characterized diversely. Despite being a male, I am aware of certain traits I possess that my father, for instance, an immigrant from the Dominican Republic, may very well classify as ‘feminine’ or plainly not masculine, when considering the male chauvinism that I’ve come to associate with Dominican men, and many Latin or Hispanic men. One such quality may be my disinterest in sports for instance. When my father discovered that I did not display the inherent aptitude and affinity for baseball that his lineage has seen, he was devastated, so to speak. Similarly, he questions my liking of female artists, and even my open-minded nature. He is sometimes taken aback when I approach him intellectually about a profound subject matter. I myself, have always used my father and the other Dominican men who I have grown up with, as somewhat of a standard for which to measure my own characterizations and identity with gender. I am proud to say that I greatly deviate from this standard.
Gender is more defines as what do you identify with (Man or Women). sex is more specific as to are you male or female.
I feel like there are several different genders because of the varieties of people we have (Bruce Jenner). a male can identify himself as a female because that’s what he feels like he was suppose to be born as or can relate more too, sex defines you as what genitals you have. i feel like society forces people to conform to one identity (as female or male, straight, bisexual,gay, etc). from birth we are forced to identify as girl or boy (example ; baby showers boy= blue, girl = pink). they’re cartoons telling children girls are suppose to want to marry be clean, cook, have children if you want to work become a teacher or nurse (nurturing roles) and boys are suppose to work hard and provide become a construction worker play with cars or become a mechanic , be a doctor and get dirty basically lead women. but what if it was the other way around? what if men had to carry children? even as adults we still see these roles on television. I’ve never seen a women firefighter on television, but i think we’re slowly progressing with open mindedness on Gender identity.
My gender identity is being a female. I grew up with girl clothes and I always had girl toys and did girly things. When I was little, I’ll have my mom paint my nails, I would wear a lot of bracelets, I always had my small purse with me and I was just being me. As I grew older, things with me never changed but I did started to act less girly because I found it like it was too cheesy for me and I didn’t want to act that way anymore. I started wearing different type of colors to represent who I was and not see myself as if I was just this girl that was too girly. I am a female who does female things and that will never change.
As a result, it is good to understand your gender identity because there are many people that struggle not knowing their gender or sexual identity and it’s hard for people to deal with. In order for people to define themselves, they would need time to explore different gender and sexual identities throughout their lives. People will know and understand their gender identity by demonstrating the honesty of which gender will work out best for them. But remember this, the ONLY person that can define their gender identity is themselves. Nobody can tell them otherwise!
I am the first born female in my family. I love to look back at baby pictures and listen to my moms stories on how my father was upset that I wasn’t a boy. The times I was left to be taken care of my father, my mom would find me in boy clothes. I also only had male cousins to play with and I grew up to be a “tough” girl, however, I do identify myself as a female who likes the opposite sex. Here and there in the cold winter season I love looking tomboyish but it’s just my style.
My brother is the next born child who is only 4 years younger than me and throughout his childhood, he was always what we call “Soft”. He was always the sweetest kid and we then began to think he was Gay and question him about being Gay. In this case, we asked my father what he would think if his son actually is Gay. My father was pretty pissed off saying “My only son cannot be Gay. He just can’t”!
Well, he got lucky because my brother is just as straight as he can be.
My younger sister in fact confessed that she is lesbian. Somehow my father was alright with that and said “We shouldn’t judge her sexual preference”.
How is it that my father is ok with my sisters sexual preference and would go nuts to even think about his son being gay? Anyhow, I don’t discriminate anyone’s sexual preference and I believe that there is in fact two genders out there (Male and Female) but I think It’s up to anyone’s choice to be who they feel most comfortable and to be with someone who they feel comfortable with even if they are from the same sex.
I have always identify myself as a male, because I have a male body parts and also do what regular males do in today society. i got the gender identity that i have from society and my parents. growing up i was basically taught how to act and what to do in today society because i was born as a male.people these days don’t even care what gender they was born into if they feel out of place they will just take the steps on changing that.
My gender identity is a male, and i am 100% cool with it. I do think that there are definitely more than 2 different kinds of genders out of 7 billion people. I grew up playing baseball, soccer, and played with the usual kids toys for boys. My parents dressed however i wanted to, which was normal attire for a little kid. I had an older sister who also grew up with you standard little girl toys, tons of them. That gave me a bearing subconsciously I’m guessing, where it drew the line between guy and girl. I now participate in the male stereotype by driving a truck, growing a beard, and wearing all guys clothing. Some guys, and some girls, want to dress or look a little outside of the norm, there should not be any problem with that. Again, 7 Billion people, thats a lot of individual expression. The amount of creativity one person can produce can be record breaking. The number of people around the world is overwhelming, and clothing or sexual orientation should cast immediate judgment. There are lots of people, including myself, who cross this gender barrier. Which in actuality just means what ever is masculine can’t be feminine, and vice versa. A gender normality is just the opposite of what the other gender does. Example: women’s clothing are constricting and meant to slow you down (dresses, heels, corsets), while male clothing is meant to empower you and give you room. Men are supposed to be assertive, while women are supposed to be passive. These are age old ideas, are we really going to keep rules instilled from a time where a majority of the population was not free. Think about things that were government law 100 years ago; should we really follow something like that? My answer is no.
growing up I didn’t really know the gender sexuality rules until I was in middle school and high school. I don’t know if this is because my family is broken that I was never clear on witch gender to pursue. In the begging I had very close without knowing the word lesbian. Towards the end of high school when I learned about the term pansexual I thought that seemed to fit me how I went choosing people, but when I came to college and discovered the spectrum of gender and sexuality that actually does exist. I met Asexual, trans genders and cross dressers the stories of their pilgrimage into being acknowledge puts a lot into perspective. Remember the time before heath class when you thought your privates were weird because they weren’t like everybody else’s well if we just went back to that I think people would be able to accept the idea of more than two sexuality.
I identify as female but I’m not hugely attached to my gender. I feel like I kind of go through phases where I’ll feel more feminine or less feminine… To be honest I don’t even know. My gender is definitely an ongoing performance. For a while I was dressing really androgynous and even cut my hair but recently I suddenly stopped identifying with all that and feeling more like wearing dresses and “feminine” clothing. It just sort of comes and goes, which is why I think that gender identity is on a spectrum and isn’t just one thing or the other.
My parents never heavily forced gender roles on me or my brother. However, I think I mostly “learned” my gender through my peers in elementary school. Everyone would talk about how princesses were a girl thing and Pokemon was a boy thing, etc… every single interest had its own gendered connotation! I wish this wasn’t the case because I grew up to like a lot of things that I probably would have liked a lot earlier if there hadn’t been societal pressures to act “feminine”.
I outwardly identify as male but I feel like I probably do not completely subscribe to that gender. My gender was largely given to me by my parents. They reinforced this through punishment whenever I acted outside the gender binary. Even when I came out to them at pansexual they regarded this as breaking gender roles. Heternormativity and the gender binary go hand in hand. I most clearly perform my gender by the way I dress. I dress in a clearly masculine style with loose jeans, baggy t-shirts and sometimes plaid shirts. I wish to dress more androgynously but that can be very difficult for some masculine-bodied people. Over all I wish society would be more accepting of people outside the gender binary and didn’t attack people or invalidate the identities of people experimenting with their gender by calling them things like “trans-trenders.”
My gender was never pushed on me as a girl. Yes, when I was little I had a pink room, my mother always dressed me in sparkly dresses, and I played with barbies until middle school, but as I aged and started to express my interests in other things, my parents were nothing but thrilled. When my brother was born, I was just as interested in his trucks and legos as I was with my barbies. When he and my father became involved in boy scouts, I was more interested in camping and hiking with them than selling cookies for my girl scout troop. I admire the way in which I was brought up because the focus was on my interests, not on my gender. That being said, I believe that my gender identity is defined by what makes me happy. I believe this ideal should be applied to how everyone defines their gender.
I don’t think my mother raised to be a girly girl because she is not AT ALL. She is into khakis where as I am into skinny jeans and leggings. She prefers to wear those comfy theme park shoes where as I prefer to wear Uggs. She doesn’t wear makeup, I love it. She likes shades of brown, I love pink. Even though we are polar opposite, my mother never forced me to act or dress a certain way. If she bought something I didn’t like she’d just take it back to the store and would say “Whatever, I’m saving money.” Which was great for me because I kind of got to be someone different everyday. One day I’d decide I wanted to be a skater girl the next day I wanted to be on Project Runway. She never would say anything about how I went to school, she let me learn for myself who I wanted to be. My mom never cared how she looked, probably because she is a gymnastics coach so she was usually always in sweats. Like my mom, I pretty much didn’t care either until I got a little older. Once I got to high school I noticed how every girl looked like a model and I didn’t. I wanted to look just like them because I wanted people to think I was beautiful like I thought they were. So I dressed up a little more and put a little makeup up on, to my surprise people actually began talking to me more. Society is a funny thing.. I was always friends with these people but as soon as I became more girlish, more people wanted to be my friend. I guess you could say my gender choice was influenced by me watching people as I grew up and me choosing who I wanted to be in life. So I made it happen and now people would probably describe me as super girly because I love everything pink and sparkly. The more sparkles the better.
The gender I associate with is that of being a male. I believe we are trained from the day we are born on what gender we are/act like. The minute you come home you are dressed in gender toned clothes (Blue v. Pink), and you are placed into a bedroom that has those same colors. On your first birthday you are given presents that go along with what your assigned gender is. Boys are given trucks while girls are given dolls. You learn your gender identity by everyone who raises you. Everybody you come across in life has an impact on what gender you associate with. If everyone treats you in the typical male way (Rough housing,trucks,sports, and the color blue) you will fully believe and accept that you are a boy. If your whole life you are treated as a male and suddenly a person comes along and treats you like a girl, you may start to second guess your gender.It is important for adults to not confuse children when it comes to gender.
I am still in the exploration of my gender identity, for throughout my life, I have grown up preferring stuffed animals over dolls, Lego over Polly Pocket, and having more male friends than female. I wasn’t afraid to get down in the dirt and dirty up a sundress my mom got for me, nor did I particularly take to wearing traditionally girly colors (ie: pink). Approaching early highschool, I met people along the spectrum and used to consider of them messed up in the head, because one particular student two years younger than me kept changing their name and gender and sexuality on a triweekly basis. There have been recent talks of the term “transtrending” on the internet, to where people present themselves as out of the gender binary for attention. To this day I’m sure this person does it for attention. I come from the middle of nowhere, New Jersey, where everyone knows everybody. There are few people who haven’t heard of A, who loudly announces what gender they are that day and what pronouns to use and what name to address them by.
As I got older, I learned more about the gender spectrum and grew to understand it better through friends in the LGBTQIA+ communities.
Throughout a majority of my life, I have always had an androgynous appearance, where even to this day people ask whether I am a boy or a girl depending on what I’m wearing. Rather than simply answer, I respond with “what do you think ?” And regardless as to what they answer with, I say “yep”. Unless I run out of clothes or am obligated to dress within the gender binary for formal occasions (like women wearing a dress to prom and men, a suit), I typically dress in the usual T-shirt and jeans. I always compress my breasts to be as small as possible without getting uncomfortable by wearing small sports bras. I’ve never liked my breasts and perhaps that may have been a factor in how I present myself, as well as questioning my identity. I don’t lose sleep over it, however, because my gender identity isn’t essential to who I am as a person.
Upon coming to college, I’ve considered doing a social experiment for one of my classes in which I notify the professor in advance of my plans to see what would happen if the rest of the students would do in thinking I was not of my biological sex. Really, the only difference would be the use of pronouns, but people will still get bent out of shape for that.
I think gender is one of the biggest issues currently in society. Everybody is too uncomfortable with accepting anything that isn’t what they consider the “norm” so they shame and don’t allow people to be anything other than the typical male or female. There is also too strong of a hold on the concept of girls like pink and play with dolls and boys like blue and play with trucks. I myself have always been a “girly girl” but my sisters were tomboys growing up, they played with trucks and video games and wore boy clothes and played every sport. I think parents and society need to be more understanding and let children like whatever they are going to like. You can’t tell some just because they are a girl they can’t like playing football or just because they are a boy they can’t like playing dress up. You also can’t tell someone who feels uncomfortable in their skin every single day that they can’t “change their gender” because it makes you uncomfortable or you don’t like it. That is basically punishing somebody for their body and mind being born as two different souls, something 100 percent out of their control. Our society is so obsessed with being normal and following the norm and not allowing out of the ordinary but it is 2015, society as a whole needs to accept that can’t be allowed anymore. Gender is just a word it is not a defining factor about somebody. Everybody should be free to dress and act and go about their lives however they want. There is nothing wrong with being different and it is not fair to be bullied or laughed at our judged, etc.. for not following the standard guidelines society had laid out so many years ago.
My gender identity is male and I got this identity ever since I was a little boy, my parents dressed me in “male clothes” and always got me involved in sports which is usually pushed to men. I have an older sister that was playing with dolls and watching disney channel all day so because she was older she always picked what we watched on tv or the toys we would play with. Yes as a little kid i did play with dolls every now and then and know every disney channel movie which might be classified as a girl thing todo but while doing these activities it never made me think I was not a boy or anything less then a boy.
With that being said of myself knowing my sexual identity. I do not find it fair for people who do not know their identity to be put down or thought of less then a person, everyone is different in their own ways and should be accepted no matter what the circumstances are.
I understand that not everyone conforms to the cookie-cutter male or female gender and that there are many different sexual orientations. I also believe that you should be allowed to express yourself freely no matter your gender or sexual orientation. I just don’t understand how somebody discovers that they are not female or male and heterosexual. I was raised as a girl and I loved it. I loved playing with Barbies, wearing dresses, having long hair, and simply being girly. Even now as an adult I enjoy dressing and behaving feminine and sticking to the norms of being a heterosexual female. I honestly just do not get how someone figures out that they do not fit the norms, I try to understand but I think it is someone that you just cannot relate to unless you are that way.
I got the gender identity that I have not just because I have female parts, but because my family raised me as a girl. My parents dressed me in pink as a child and put bows in my hair. They painted my room pink and bought me Barbie dolls to play with. My parents identified me as a girl before I could, which caused everyone else to identify me as a girl. Along with my parents, the media taught me how to perform my gender. I grew up watching various kids shows and I mimicked the girls’ mannerisms. Through television, I learned what it was like to perform the role of a girl in elementary school, middle school, high school, and college before I even experienced each phase in person.
Indeed, so you can appreciate then how much of what we assume is “natural” about gender is actually socially constructed. Isn’t sociology interesting?
I identify as a male, because I have male parts. My gender identity is simple. even though i would say I have no problem doing “female” activities i firmly identify as heterosexual. I was taught how to do things for myself, so cooking ,cleaning,baking,sewing,and first aid are all traits that i learnt at a young age.i also like to take care of myself i admit that i have gotten my nails and eyebrows done before and even though its sexist a lot of young men would get ridiculed for taking care of there bodies or even knowing how to do these things. however because i have such a firm grip on my sexual identity even at a young age it didn’t bother me what so ever cause i know later on in life it would help me.plus at the end of the day while there eating cheese and crackers , i’ll be making myself a decent meal.
I identify as a female, but, to me, gender is a fluid thing. It isn’t something that can be solely defined by any one variable. Someone who has male genitalia, may not necessarily identify as male, whereas someone who has female genitalia might. Gender is something that, I feel, is constructed as we grow. We are taught what toys to play with and what clothes to wear according to our gender stereotype. As famous drag entertainer Ru Paul says, “We’re all born naked, and the rest is drag.”
Excellent quote!
I identify as a female, because biologically, I have female parts. However, my gender identity is complicated. I’d say I have a well mixed blend of male and female personality traits and I also identify as bisexual. I was raised to be myself, not to force myself to fall under any specific set of “female” norms unless I wanted to. My toys as a child were trucks, legos, barbies and ponies. I loved them all without prejudice. The freedom my parents gave me really helped me in the long run. I became my own person, and for that I’m forever grateful. So over all, I’d say that I fall somewhere in the middle of male and female.
Gender has always been an extremely interesting subject, or idea, for me. I myself, was born female, and have chosen to still identify as female. This however, doesn’t mean that I follow the stereotypical “girly things”. I don’t LOVE shopping. I never have, so why should I just because of the gender that I identify with? Pink is also not my favorite color (shocking?!) and I don’t dance or cheerlead. I’m not saying that it is wrong to associate with any of these things if you are a girl, but I’m just saying that you don’t have to.
I have two younger sisters and often times I have seen them almost being forced to choose between genders in some situations. For example, when we went to Disney, many of the things that were associated with girls were Princesses and Minnie Mouse, yet my sisters don’t really care for either of those. My youngest sister loves Toy Story. However, Toy Story, although loved by many, is more often associated with boys. So, when we were in the Toy Story shops and park area, I could see some other parents looking almost bewildered that my two sisters and I were having a great time meeting all the Toy Story characters and wearing Woody’s hats or Buzz Lightyear wings.
Similarly, I have a younger boy cousin, who is about the age of one of my sisters. He loves playing baseball and with dinosaurs, but he also loves dressing up in tutus and playing with babies just the same. Just because he identifies as, and biologically is, a boy doesn’t mean that he can’t wear “girly colors” or play with “girl toys”. He and my sister even recognize how society divides things by gender. They see it everywhere, stores, school, TV; it’s all over the place.
Luckily I think that our society is beginning to change our ways of categorizing things or people by genders. The picture in this article, The Genderbread Person, really made think. I found it to be a really accurate representation of what people are associated with according to their gender. However, just because you are born with male or female parts, shouldn’t limit you to identifying with that specific gender, or liking a specific gender, etc.